Is The Doompill Real?

Triangulum Galaxy

“Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.”
– Dylan Thomas

You may have heard of the words “redpilled” or “bluepilled,” references from the 1999 film The Matrix. The two different pills represented Truth and Ignorance, respectively.

The whole idea of “-pilled” became a thing, and we saw the emergence of words like “blackpilled” and “doompilled” which represent Nihilism and fatalism. They embody the ideas that “nothing we do matters, because the world’s outcome has already been determined.” This itself stems from the idea of Determinism- that everything that happens has already been predetermined.

Does anything really matter?

Does it really matter if we try to fix anything? Does it even matter that we exist at all?

Of course it matters, because we’re not just sentient blobs of dust shambling around on a rock. We are God’s creation, even with all our flaws and imperfections imposed on us by the Dark World. At our core, the very fact that we are sentient is amazing. And to know that we were created this way by an unseen, omnipotent God makes it even more incredible.

And to think that the incredible omnipotent God cares about us, and wants to know us is simply unbelievable.

But it’s 100% true.

 

ADHD and Spirituality, Part 3

You may remember the piece I wrote a while back about ADHD and Faith. Or maybe the one about Spirituality and Mental Disorders.

Have you ever wanted to be able to do something, but weren’t able to mentally do it? Have you ever wondered “If ADHD, or depression is a mental disorder, how does that affect my ability to ‘take every thought captive to be obedient in Christ’?”

How can I “take every thought captive” when my frontal cortex is dysfunctional? Some people will ask “Do you believe God wants you to be focused?” Well, I would hope so… but I also believe God doesn’t want people to die from cancer. And yet it still happens.

“People don’t choose to get sick!” you might say, and you’re right. But I didn’t choose to have ADHD either. I mean, it’s all I’ve ever known, but at no point did anyone ask me if that’s what I wanted.

Furthermore, what I believe about God’s character doesn’t seem to affect my ADHD in any way, as far as I know.  But does my mental “disability” affect my spiritual walk? And if so, how can I know? How can I tell if I’m just spiritually apathetic, or if it’s just my brain refusing to work the way I want it to?

Is there any hope for Christians with ADHD? Continue reading “ADHD and Spirituality, Part 3”

Who’s In Control?

Over the last three years, I’ve come to realize that we’re not in control of much of anything.

“I’m in control of my own destiny!” you exclaim defiantly. “I only do what I want to do!”

But that’s only partially true. One could argue that nobody can force you to do anything, but that’s not true either. They can make your life miserable to the point where you’ll do anything to make it stop. (Side note: this is called torture.)

I’m not talking about Free Will or The Matrix- I’m talking about autonomy.

How much of what we do is “allowed” and how much of it is “free?” If you’re in control of your own actions, but have to change or limit what you do under threat of force, are you really free? Continue reading “Who’s In Control?”

What Is Church?

I recently read through the book “Pagan Christianity?” and was struck by how much of what we call “modern church” is actually borrowed from ancient non-church traditions, including sermons, clergy, and (you guessed it) modern worship music.

Does that mean we shouldn’t sing worship songs?” No, that’s not what it means.

What it illustrates is the fact that we are so removed from our traditions, we don’t even question why we (the church) do what we do. Pragmatism abounds, and popularity seems to be the dominant requirement for whether or not a church does something.

Jesus wasn’t popular. Continue reading “What Is Church?”

Purpose Redux

Over the last week, I’ve been examining my Core Values, and let me tell you, it’s been harder than I expected it to be. You might think “What’s so hard about writing down what you value?” Well, give it a try, and see for yourself.

Ultimately, it boils down to what things drive your decisions and relationships, and whether or not your daily actions line up with where you want to go, and who you want to be.

As I wrote about previously, it’s easy to get caught up in feeling like your worth is tied into what you can do. But sometimes that’s out of your control, so why should you feel inferior for not being able to do something you had no control over? Continue reading “Purpose Redux”

When Things Get Difficult

There are times when you will go through the most unimaginable trials. These are the times when you find out what really drives you.

For the last 18 months, I’ve been going through wave after wave of difficulties, each one progressively harder than the last. I’m halfway expecting to come up on a “Final Boss” and win some sort of game, and then the credits will run and I can finally rest.

Why so down?” you might ask. You’d be right in assuming I’m struggling with things- it hasn’t been easy. I’m currently writing this blog post on my phone as I wait to be allowed back into my state. We just survived Hurricane Ida, which directly hit my hometown. There’s massive wind damage everywhere. There probably won’t be power there for weeks. I have no way of knowing how bad the damage to my house is.

It doesn’t seem like it was that long ago we were evacuating for Hurricane Katrina. But 16 years to the day, and here we are.

Everyone will face some sort of storm in their lives, and I’m no exception. Mine are oftentimes physical storms, but the principal is the same- you find out what you’re really made of, and your deficits are quickly revealed.

Everyone has shortcomings. But most people are content to just admit they do, and go on with life, never knowing what they could do or be if they’d just admit they need help.

I will lift up my eyes to the mountains; From where shall my help come? My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.
Psalms 121:1‭-‬2

The Importance Of Accountability

Years ago, when I was a young adult, “accountability partners” were a popular thing. Our church leaders would encourage us to find someone we could share our struggles with, and use that relationship to hold each other to higher standards- in a way that was private, but effective.

If you asked someone today who their accountability partner is, you might get a blank stare, a puzzled look, or even a scowl. It seems like people, especially church leaders, have forgotten what accountability is for.

Accountability is defined as “Explainable, answerable, an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions.”

Throughout history, we see the effects of leaders who didn’t have accountability, and the disastrous effects it led to. But most people won’t accept a rebuke from just anyone; there needs to be a level of trust there that most people just don’t want to commit to. Continue reading “The Importance Of Accountability”

How I Joined The Fraternity Of Excellence

Years ago, back in 2010, I wrote a brief article about how much I desperately wanted to live a life of significance, but couldn’t, because I didn’t know how.

I said things like this-

“I can see myself in the near future breaking out of the corporate mold that has held me in prison for so long. It has provided a living for my family, yes, but has stripped me of the ability to do anything but work 8 to 5.”
-Me, 2010

I realize now just how long I’ve been wanting to break free from that mold, and how long I’ve struggled with it. When I say “I’ve been in a rut for over ten years,” I’m not kidding. The proof is right here.

Looking back on this now, in January of 2021, I realize this was really the origin of the journey to where I am now. Even back then, I knew I had to do something. But I was unprepared, and uneducated on how to get where I wanted to go. And nobody was urging me onward to do it.

Right then, I decided I was going to do something about it. I started bike commuting to work, lost a bunch of weight, and was (physically, at least) making a lot of progress. I wrote about how I wanted to start working on blogging and writing professionally, and started taking steps towards that. I was logging over 100 miles a week on the bike, and was in the best shape of my life.

All good things, right? I was on the way to making it happen. I was moving forward. I was “crushing it.”

Then, in July of 2011, I was severely injured in a cycling accident. Everything in my life came to a screeching halt. I was bedridden for weeks, and on crutches for 3 months. The doctors said I might never walk without a limp. I was absolutely, utterly devastated. Continue reading “How I Joined The Fraternity Of Excellence”