For the last year or so, I’ve been (slowly) working towards simplifying my life. This has been both educational, and very difficult. It’s only when you realize how much modern America has strayed from it’s self-sufficient roots that you begin to realize how radical Frugality is nowadays. Years ago, fixing your own car or canning your own home-grown produce was not just commonplace, it was expected. People sewed their own clothes, for goodness’ sake! Shoes got repaired, not replaced. People rode bikes everywhere. It was unusual for a family to have more than one car, if they had one at all.
Today, life looks much different. On one hand, I’m totally repulsed by it. On the other hand, I’ve been raised in it long enough that I’ve adapted to it, and have come to expect things will be there when I want them. I’m used to getting whatever I want, whether or not I can afford it.
This is called Hedonic Adaptation. Basically, the idea is that despite America (or any other developed country) having more riches and amenities than any other time in the history of the human race, we’re not really that much happier than people were hundreds of years ago.
What it boils down to is this: we quickly adapt to the level of comfort we are given, and over time, what was once “awesome” now becomes “ordinary” because well, everybody’s got one. Nobody missed the iPhone 5 fifty years ago, because nobody knew what one was, and nobody cared. They didn’t miss it. They didn’t need it. People could still call their friends on the phone, and could still send them text messages (written on paper, but still…) but today, a smartphone is seen as a “necessity.”
Let me tell you something: Smartphones are not necessary to be happy. Neither are cars, or TVs, or anything else you can think of. It’s all in your state of mind. If you are a farmer from Central America, you might be happy with having a good crop, your health to work with, and a comfy place to call home. Not much else matters outside of that.
In America, we’ve lost sight of what happiness is, because companies are constantly telling us we need something new to be happy. A newer car will make you more successful. A newer house will make you more secure. A newer slimmer body will give you the spouse of your dreams. A newer _______ will make you feel _______ and so on, and so on. None of these things are required to make people happy. In our day and age, everybody wants to have it all. Everyone wants to drive an expensive car, live in a massive house, have an expensive wardrobe, and so on. But this reveals the error of our ways.
What is a car’s purpose in the world? To carry you from point A to point B. Do you need an expensive car to do this? No. So why do expensive cars exist? Because people want them. People want the prestige and the status that goes along with driving a BMW. Never mind the fact that buying a new BMW will put you in debt over your head, and repairs on them cost you an arm and a leg. So is it the car that is costing you, or is it your ego that is costing you? Have you seen car ads? The companies know this! They’re playing you. And we love every minute of it.
It’s our egos. Instead of thinking a cheap reliable car is smart, we say “people will think I’m poor!” Instead of buying good clothes that will last and look good, we pay 400% markups for a stupid label on a shirt so people will think we’re “cool.”
Reality check: What you own doesn’t make you cool. If you’re an insufferable idiot with nice stuff, you’re still an insufferable idiot. Buying nice things will not make people like you. People will like your stuff, and I guess for some people, they’re okay with that. It’s easier to buy a top-end BMW/Mercedes/Maserati/etc. on credit and let people think you’re hard-working and intelligent, than to actually be hard-working and intelligent.
Don’t think I’m picking on nice cars specifically, this applies to everything. Smartphones, houses, clothes, electronics, anything you can buy. When people waste money on expensive things that they don’t need, it shows that they value other people’s opinions of them more than they value themselves. They would rather put up appearances in the hopes that they can convince people to like them, instead of actually being likeable people.
And yes, I’ve done it. I’m not perfect. You didn’t think I was pointing fingers without looking at my own life, did you? Far from it. I’d like to think my days of trying to impress people are over, though. I have better things to do with my time and money. My kids will never care what brand of watch I bought, or what kind of car I drove. My wife doesn’t care if I have an authentic vintage guitar amp, or if I wear name brand clothes. My parents don’t care if I live in a mobile home, as long as it meets our needs, isn’t falling apart, or a safety hazard. And when I pay it off in a few years, I will be living in it free! You know how many people in America today can say they’re 100% debt-free? Not many, let me tell you. But you know what? Most of them are happy.
Wouldn’t you like to be happy…. really happy? News flash: You can’t buy it. I’ll just leave you with this quote from William Bennett: (I don’t specifically support everything Bennett believes, but this particular morsel rings true)
“Happiness is like a cat, If you try to coax it or call it, it will avoid you; it will never come. But if you pay no attention to it and go about your business, you’ll find it rubbing against your legs and jumping into your lap.”