Sadly, modern Feminism is destroying the gentleman. Instead of encouraging women to become more, since the 50’s it has mostly slid into the practice of dragging men down. It is becoming difficult to teach boys to be gentlemen when girls are constantly being told they don’t need gentlemen. Or men.
Being a gentleman is a lost social grace… when technically they’re not needed. If a man serves as a gentleman at all times, when the need arises he will be ready and trained to think of others outside himself.
We have to break the cycle. It has to start somewhere. We must continue to teach and expect our boys to be gentlemen, regardless of what society tells them. That way when things finally (hopefully!) level out and reason comes back into fashion, they will be poised and ready to fill that role in society. They refuse to be victims, and insist on true “correctness” even when nobody is looking.
What is the purpose of a Gentleman? Why are they in short supply, and are they even really needed? The Fierce Gentleman Manifesto breaks a Gentleman down into twenty-one basics, which does an excellent job of explaining. So much so, that I’m not going to try to recreate what they’ve already done so well. I’ll touch on a few of these that are near and dear to my life, however.
- We renounce status-seeking in favor of a purpose-driven life.
This means we derive our value, our worth to society, from our accomplishments (and following a higher power) and not from what others think of us. Even if nobody notices, we will strive to do our best. - We give up divided attention so that we may practice Presence.
This is something I constantly struggle with. It means we are always focused, and present in the task at hand, even if that task is menial or spiritual. “Presence” is the mark of someone who is mature and knows what their purpose is, and what is going on around them. - Morality is our daily habit: we exercise generosity, maintain strong determination, make diligent and sustained effort, give selfless Love, tell the truth in all cases and all ways, discipline ourselves, show tolerance, seek wisdom, practice renunciation, and cultivate equanimity. Despite what modern society tries to tell us, morality is not relative. If morality was just an artificial construct, then there would be no purpose for courts or any kind of justice system, because anything you feel is right would be right. This is obviously not the case, therefore a true Gentleman strives to not only be moral, but hold the higher ground. It is not sufficient to merely meet expectations, but we should strive to be more, for the sake of everyone around us.
These are not the only ways we can improve ourselves, but for someone striving to be a true Gentleman, this is a very good place to start. At the very least, we can acknowledge that there is more to being a man than just existing. And I challenge you, men of the world, to step up and be the examples that the rest of the world desperately needs.
You can read more about the Gentleman’s Manifesto, and the 10 Qualities that make up a Fierce Gentleman.
Jesus Christ was an excellent example of a true Gentleman. He had passion, purpose, focus, compassion, and respect. Most importantly, he did so without compromise. I know we can’t all meet his lofty example, but the fact that we strive for it sets us apart from the rest of the world that just doesn’t care.