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The Drunk Monkey Mind

One of my daily struggles is trying to decide what creative pursuits I’ll spend my time on. And believe me when I say there’s no shortage of creative things the right side of my brain is telling me to do.

But just because I can do something doesn’t mean it’s necessary. In fact, more often than not, it takes time away from more important things I need to do.

Ultimately, this deals with my subconscious mind: what’s been called “The Drunk Monkey” mind. Most people’s subconscious mind operates in two modes: keeping you alive by avoiding danger, and keeping you alive by seeking out big game to hunt.

I heard a story about a young woman who was recently killed while standing around at a highway rest stop by a rogue flying 18-wheeler tire. Just standing there, and WHAM! Truck tire in the face. Dead. My subconscious- my “drunk monkey mind”- says “Great! Now every time you’re near a highway you have to look for flying tires.” It is desperately afraid of everything. This is the “avoiding danger” part of the monkey. It’s trying to keep me alive despite my best efforts to live. Continue reading “The Drunk Monkey Mind”

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Adrenalinn III Review: Part 2

This is a continuation of the Adrenalinn III pedal review, you can see the previous installment here. This time, we’re going to look at the pedal’s effects, i.e. delay, reverb, compression, and modulation. The reverb and delay are pretty basic, so we’ll spend most of our time looking at the spectacular modulation effects. If you’re a fan of John Mayer, you’ve probably heard this pedal’s modulation- it’s the pedal he uses on the songs Bigger Than My Body, Heartbreak Warfare, and I Don’t Trust Myself.

The way the pedal routes the signal internally can be changed to a certain extent: you can change the order of Amp, Mod, and Compressor in the chain. Delay and Reverb always come last (partly because you can also route the drum machine through delay/reverb). The compressor can be used pre-amp as a sort of clean boost, or after as a limiter.
Continue reading “Adrenalinn III Review: Part 2”

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Small Thinking, Small Focus

One of the things I’ve noticed recently is how myopic and narrow-minded people have become about everything. I mean, if you have an opinion about anything, someone out there wants to rake you over the coals for it. Don’t like animals? Someone hates you for that. Love animals? Someone else hates you for that. Doesn’t matter what you think, somebody is ready and willing to vehemently disagree.

But where did this come from? I’m old enough that I can remember things weren’t always this way. Why is everyone suddenly enraged about the stupidest little things? Why aren’t people’s well-established opinions respected at all any more? Why does anyone else even care what I eat, or wear, or think?

Simply put, I think it’s because people have been trained to hyperfocus their anger. The current generation is the product of decades of targeted marketing, social media, and manufactured outrage. They think small. Their focus is small.

I think what’s happened is that when people realized that the World’s problems were bigger than they could handle, they hyper-focused on one thing they would become champions for. And they will defend it to the death. Continue reading “Small Thinking, Small Focus”

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Passing The Torch

Sometimes God speaks to you through really weird circumstances. And sometimes He just shows you something that was there all along, but you didn’t really notice.

Last night, I was watching the Pixar movie Cars 3. It was pretty funny, but it dealt with some interesting stuff (for a supposed “kid’s” movie). In it, Lightning McQueen begins losing races to a bunch of new up-and-coming racers who are tech-savvy, strong, and just plain faster than him. And of course, he mopes about it for a while, but then decides to try and beat them at their own game by training like them.

And as can be expected, it doesn’t work for McQueen. In his quest to find his “missing mojo” he runs across Doc Hudson’s old mentor, who informs him that as much as Doc loved racing, his biggest achievement and joy was training McQueen to carry on his legacy and passion for racing.

And as I sat there watching the credits roll, I was reminded of how true this is for anyone who’s getting older, and who feels their dream has eluded them. Like me.

Sometimes, like in King David’s life, God says (I’m paraphrasing) “You’ve served me well, and you’ve been faithful in starting construction of the Temple, but it is not your place to finish it. Your son will complete the Temple.” (This is in David’s speech in 1 Chronicles 28 before he appoints Solomon as the new King.)

I thought about all the years I’ve spent dedicating myself to music ministry, how much I love it, and how much passion I have for worship. How desperately I longed to be able to lead worship for a living. And despite this, God said to me “You may never get the chance to travel the world and play music for a living, but you can train up the next generation to do it.”

And truth be told, that means I have to love the act of God being worshiped more than I love to worship God on my own. I need to get over the idea that nobody else can meet that need. I have to want to see younger worship leaders grow- I can’t keep my knowledge and experience to myself. Continue reading “Passing The Torch”

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Where Is Your Joy?

Sometimes I  grow weary of writing about the same things over and over. But that’s what I know.

I don’t really want to spend all my time writing about current events or politics, because honestly, I don’t care. I only watch enough to prepare myself. No amount of shouting from the rooftops will prevent the coming societal breakdown, if there is one in my lifetime.

I mostly write about creative pursuits, because I’m a creative kind of guy. So where does that leave me when I’m not really working on any specific creative projects?

Well, I’ve had some really good discussions lately with a younger friend and aspiring writer. We’ve spent some time going through plot structure, motivations, story mechanics, and all sorts of interesting things. And it’s kind of gotten me interested in writing fiction again. And there’s no end of half-completed stories I could work on.

I’ve also been inspired to make ambient guitar music by Bill of Chords of Orion (I highly recommend his Youtube channel, he’s the Bob Ross of guitar). He issued a challenge to make a simple, 5-song EP using whatever you have laying around. I’ve really been intrigued by this, and I want to give it a shot.

Both of these projects would require a dedication of time, which I am perilously short on. And there’s so many other things I want to do- which is always the case- and so I have to choose what gets done and what doesn’t. An exercise routine also needs to go in that mix.

I think for starters, making a 5-song ambient guitar EP would be the fastest and easiest. I could complete this in a couple of weeks. It wouldn’t be spectacular of course, but would be enough of a challenge to get my feet wet.

The book ideas, though, will require much more time. World-building, character and plot development, and actually writing it should take several months, at best.

Do I want to dedicate an entire year of free time to writing, editing, and publishing another book? I guess that depends on what I hope to get out of it. For me to make any money at it would require immediately writing another one- and then another one after that. Almost nobody makes a career out of writing a single book. So if I were doing it for any other reason than “I just want to” it would mean years of dedicating myself to writing. And as much of a challenge as that would be, I’m not sure I’d be up for it.

Of course, if I spent that same amount of time making an album instead, who knows what it would be like? Probably decent, but what would the creative process look like?

The Process of Finding Joy

Ultimately, I could do either one. I’m perfectly capable of writing another book or making an album. But which one would bring me more joy and life?

I think for me, making music is something that I’m not only good at, but I’m also passionate about. And as I’ve written about recently, instead of submerging myself in Contemporary worship music, I should be singing my own song to God. Which means I need to start writing down some of the many song ideas I’ve had over the last 20 years.

Can I shape them into some kind of music that satisfies me? Would anyone else like it? I don’t know, but I have an itch I need to scratch.

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The Nine Laws: Part Seven

If you haven’t read my previous installments on The Nine Laws, you can start here. In essence, I’ve read through The Nine Laws by Ivan Throne, and I decided that the book was interesting and impacting enough that I should go into a detailed breakdown of each law, and expound my opinion on how it relates to Christianity.

Today we’re going to examine the Seventh Law: Power.

If you haven’t read The Nine Laws (and I’d recommend you do), Mr. Throne explains the division and unity of Thought, Word, and Deed. He explains how ultimate purpose can be achieved when all three of these are in harmony.

On a more traditional philosophical level, these roughly correlate to Spirit, Mind, and Body. And as created beings, we are uniquely spiritual, in the sense that animals do not have Divine Purpose; they simply follow programming. Humans alone posses the faculties to connect with the Divine.

Since the Seventh Law is Power, we’ll address power in each of these three areas, as they are separate yet related. In our Dark Triad traits, Power manifests itself as:

Narcissism: Prerogative arises from possession.​
Machiavellianism: Subtle tendrition arises from the core.​
Psychopathy: Absence of ego in the cutting through.​

Note: When Mr. Throne speaks of the Dark Triad, he’s referring to them in the purest sense. We often see them used for selfish reasons, which is caused when one or more of the traits are abused or allowed to interact without restraint. However, most of the greatest men in history displayed all three of these traits prominently. It stands to reason that when used in the right proportions, for the right purpose, they are a maelstrom of natural force to be reckoned with. This is the goal Mr. Throne encourages us to attain: achieving our purpose using the Dark World’s own laws against itself. And the only way to do that is by understanding how the laws work.

We’ll work through the analysis of Power exhibited through Thought, Word, and Deed, because the Spiritual aspect of it, while being the least understood, is the most important. I want to make sure we address it fully.

Jesus touches on this idea (and a few others) in Luke 14: Continue reading “The Nine Laws: Part Seven”

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Pedalboard or Laptop?

This is what I’m currently using to play guitar in church. It looks kind of complicated, but there’s a method to the madness.

One of the goals I’ve had for this pedalboard since I started building it was to create a one-man-band busking/performance setup. And with this last piece, I’m very close.

I added a Digitech Jamman Solo XT- but not for looping. No, I still need a looper that can sync to MIDI clock, and there’s only a few on the market. I’ll probably end up getting a TC Ditto X4, or a Pigtronix Infinity for that. The Jamman is for running backing tracks. That’s right, I can load up the SD card in it with .wav files, and use it for background pads, full-blown tracks, or whatever. I can even run click tracks on one side if I have to run a full backing track.

Of course, minimalism is something I consider an art form. And this board isn’t very minimal. In fact, it’s getting pretty big. And it makes me wonder, “Should I replace it with a single thing?”

But the only things I can find that would do what this board does would be either a laptop, or something like a TC Helicon Voicelive 3 Extreme. Neither one is a cheap alternative.

If my goal is to lead music solo, then this board is moving in the right direction. But there’s still more it could do: I can add vocal effects, and a programmable MIDI controller, and a switcher, and a looper…

At this point, I have more money tied up in these pedals than I do in all my guitars and amp put together. But would it be simpler to just sell all of that and use a laptop? Could that even be a possibility? Continue reading “Pedalboard or Laptop?”

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Supporting Bad Theology

In the last year or two, God has opened my eyes to a LOT of false teaching that goes on in the church today. (By “church” I mean the Christian church in whole- not a specific denomination.)

Suddenly realizing that you’re surrounded by false self-proclaimed “prophets” is not something you take lightly. And it’s not light conversation to bring up over coffee.

But like it or not, there is a rash of bad (and straight-up false) teaching being propagated all around you at this very moment. At best, it’s misguided. At worst, it’s heresy. And what’s more, these churches/teachers/pastors/celebrities/leaders are spreading their influence of bad theology everywhere they can. In fact, that’s a major part of their modus operandi.

“So what’s the big deal?” you’re probably wondering. “Why does that matter to me? I don’t watch them, so I don’t listen to their theology.”

Well, in fact you probably do, without even realizing it. I know I was. Continue reading “Supporting Bad Theology”

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The Nine Laws: Part Six

If you haven’t read my previous installments and review of Ivan Throne’s The Nine Laws, you can begin by clicking here.

Today, we’re going to discuss a very interesting topic. And it will be long.

The Sixth Law is Freedom.

“Freedom” for the Christian is a juxtaposition. We are indeed free from bondage of sin, free from our old Dark Worldly natures. We are free in ways that most people aren’t. We are free in the eternal sense. In a spiritual sense.

But of course, that comes at the price of our entire lives. When we submit our lives to God, we no longer belong to ourselves.

So what does “freedom” mean to the believer? What did that look like in Jesus’ life?

This is an issue I really struggled with as a new believer. I didn’t really want to give up control of my life. I wanted freedom, but on my own terms! Which as anybody knows, doesn’t normally work out that well. Just saying “I’m free!” doesn’t make it so.

So how do we reconcile this?

Let’s define what we mean by “Freedom” from both a Nine Laws perspective and a Christian perspective. Then we’ll compare them and see if they’re compatible. And if so, we’ll explore how that works. Continue reading “The Nine Laws: Part Six”

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Navigating The Manosphere

“Manosphere” may not be a term you’ve heard used often, if at all. It is, essentially, a group of websites and blogs directed towards men:

Manosphere- The name given to a loose and informal network of blogs, forums and websites, with internet commentators focusing on issues relating to men and masculinity, as a male counterpart to feminism or in opposition to it.

The problem with grouping such a variety of websites under a single moniker is of course, there are many different opinions on what constitutes “masculine” behavior. You have everything from The Art Of Manliness (which is very broad and general) to very misogynistic PUA (Pick-Up Artist) websites, and all sorts of others in between.

There are plenty of websites that give bad advice about money, politics, relationships, and so forth, but for some reason, masculinity-related sites are frequently targeted for criticism, and I think it’s directly tied in to society’s increasingly twisted views on normalcy and masculinity as a whole.

So what should you do if you’re a man looking for advice on how to improve specific areas in your life? Here’s a couple of guidelines to help you navigate the iceberg-littered sea to manhood. Continue reading “Navigating The Manosphere”